How To Gracefully Undergo A Life Transition

What type of life transition did you think about when you read that title? A positive one? A negative one? A negative, sad, or hard life transition can be difficult, but so can positive life transitions. I mean graduating college is a happy thing, but the transition from college life to a full time job can be a jarring experience that leaves you depressed (speaking from experience, hi there). Some people cope really well with change, and then there are some who need help to make it through.

There are some things to keep in mind when you’re going through a transition, whether it’s losing a boyfriend, starting a new job, moving, anything! These steps will help you gracefully transition into your new phase of life in a healthy way.

Be Mindful

Be mindful of your feelings, what’s happening around you, and keeping the big picture in mind. Something that’s helped me become more mindful is practicing meditation every morning. I use it to focus intentions and get more self awareness. With quarantine going on and things being forced to go “back to normal” so quickly I started to get very anxious about the changes happening and the shifts that I felt in my job and social life. The meditation and refocusing helped me cope with the changes until we came to a more settled place. Big tip here with being mindful is avoid social media! It just skews your brain and expectations for yourself. If you need some help with that check out my post How to Survive A Social Media Detox. Another thing to do is to journal! I am not a big journaler, I always wanted to be but I never really got into it. But if it helps you, that’s all that matters.

Embrace New Feelings

During a transition, you’re going to feel different emotions. One day you may be super excited! Like the day you graduated college, it’s a great day filled with love and support. But…then you realize it’s over and you have to be a full fledged adult. Those happy feelings kind of mold into a nostalgia and maybe even sadness. It’s okay for that to happen, but it’s important to recognize that it doesn’t mean the transition is bad. No one can stay in college forever, so you know that everyone that came before you and went through these motions survived and lived happy lives. So for now, embrace the feelings, find their core, and talk yourself through them.

 Check On Yourself

Let’s say you’re moving, and you start packing up your things in your house of 20 years. BUT you’re moving into a newer and bigger house in the neighborhood you’ve always wanted to live in. That’s going to be fun! You’re packing your dishes, your linens…and then you start packing your memories. Check on yourself to make sure you’re okay! Don’t rush yourself into feeling instantly okay with leaving your house of 20 years behind, it’s an emotional experience. Make sure you’re not bottling these things up and that you’re enjoying the last days you have in that house you made so many memories in, properly mourn the stage you were in before so you can welcome the new one with fresh eyes.

Seek Out Support

Get that support from your loved ones! Confide in only those you know have your best intentions at heart. They will be there for you and will help you cope with your emotions, even if it’s a wild roller coaster. Be with your friends, make time to do one thing you enjoy every day, and be honest with yourself and loved ones about how you’re feeling. Transitions that we go through in life can be deeply emotional experiences, it’s not an easy thing to do. If you can’t lean on your friends and family in difficult times, then who will you lean on? You don’t have to do everything alone, and you very well know you’d be there in a second if you had a loved one going through a hard time.

Worst case, you don’t want to confide in your loved ones…I understand, not everyone has a loving support system. In that case, seek out counseling so that you do have a place to go where your thoughts and feelings are heard. I almost tried BetterHelp at one point because I’ve heard such great things (plus it’s COVID friendly!).

Last But Not Least: It’s Okay If It’s Not Graceful

Hardly anything works out exactly the way we planned it. So if you find yourself losing it don’t beat yourself up! The best thing you can do if you snap and you find yourself not handling things well is to just be mindful of it. What caused you to take such a wrong turn? Return back to the system that was working for you. Make time for the things that make you happy, and focus on what you’re doing right now in the moment.

Feel free to share some tips, stories, or coping methods you have for dealing with change and transitions in the comments. We all go through them, and at varying degrees of difficulty and sanity. There isn’t one right way to deal with change, but it’s always worth a try to do it in a healthy and graceful manner. 

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